Priority Blues

My priority is less than one

Even though my needs are urgent.

Being number two is not much fun.

You get chronically insurgent.

And I'd love to stay and have a chat,

Maybe give these blues the slip,

But I will not get around to that

'Til I cash my Valium scrip.

You say "Must you always cause a fuss?

Could you please be less demanding."

But reserved don't quite apply to us.

This is not past understanding.

No, this ain't the way I get my kicks.

It's not my idea of Heaven,

When you call me up at half past six

Not to pick you up at seven.

These priority blues can make a man

Get as evil as a viper.

I know that you do the best you can.

Maybe I'll become a sniper.

You had better believe you'll notice me

When the hot lead starts a-flyin'.

I'll be cool as can be sitting in my tree.

I won't have no time for cryin'.

As a terrorist I'll be front page news

Like ol' Yasser Arafat.

I'll be planting bombs in threes and twos.

I'll be blowing up your cat.

I will burn your house and steal your car.

I will smush you with my tank.

I will go for broke. I will go too far.

I'll hijack your local bank.

"Senor, thees bank she is going to Ha-bah-nah!!!"

Priority blues have bent my brain.

They have knocked me off my ladder.

They have rubbed me against my deepest grain

And done insult to my bladder.

Many a bummer they've brought to pass

'Cause it helps to make their day go.

Now they say they will mail my pancreas

Down to Tierra del Fuego.